“I can’t believe you went there alone!” exclaimed a good friend several years back, after I told her I had traveled unaccompanied to Kenya for a safari tour.

I related tales of seeing lions lazing on lush African plains, being welcomed by buoyant hordes of Masai people clad in brilliant red wraps, and eating tender delicious cuts of wildebeest.


But she kept coming back to the same thing.

“Alone?” she repeated.

As a single woman I have traveled to several countries, sometimes alone and sometimes with other female friends. On long bus rides, in crowded marketplaces and atop the backs of elephants, I have discovered that traveling alone can be exciting, challenging and a real lesson in yourself.

When I think of strong women braving exotic lands, images of a divorced Karen Blixen surveying her coffee plantations in 1920s Kenya come to mind — scenes immortalized in the 1985 movie “Out of Africa.”
 

Maybe nowadays being a single woman in another country isn’t quite as dramatic, but it can feel just as adventurous. Imagine taking a motorcycle ride through the rice fields of Bali, or hiking early in the morning to Machu Picchu.

It’s becoming more common.

Women are getting married and having children later, often preferring to focus on their careers before settling down. According to one study, the rate of first babies for women in their 30s and 40s has quadrupled in the last 30 years.

Women also have more financial freedom today, allowing them to visit places that decades ago would have been unthinkable.

A good friend that I’ve traveled with several times points out that traveling alone can have its downfalls: being the odd person out in some groups, safety concerns, “and of course, being hit with single rates.” But generally, the flexibility that comes with traveling on your own outweighs any negative aspects.
 

Many times, just deciding to make the trip is its own reward.

Another friend recently traveled on her own to to New York City. Although she was no stranger to moving about in large cities, such as Mexico City, this was her first trip to the Big Apple. The divorced mother of three had some initial reluctance about making the journey from Texas alone.

“I just felt it would be more fun to experience the city with someone,” she says.

But upon arriving, she realized that you’re never really alone in a city that never sleeps. Map in hand, she began hitting hot spots like Central Park, SoHo and Tribeca — stopping along the way to shop, shop, shop.

One afternoon, she joined a group of fellow single women travelers on a bus tour of sights from the HBO original series “Sex and the City” and realized that, indeed, she was not alone.

“We stuck together all day and then had drinks at a trendy bar that night,” she recalls.
It quickly became one of her best vacations ever.

As fulfilling as traveling can be, personal safety is always a concern for single women abroad. All too often, many of us have experienced the unwelcome stares and gropes of men who claim harassment of women as a birthright.

Unfortunately, Hollywood and other mass media images of American women as sexually charged and easy-to-seduce have created a stereotype that is difficult to shatter.

Sometimes you learn the hard way.

As a junior in college, I had the privilege of spending four months in Nigeria on a study abroad program. Part of the curriculum included a month-long stay in a small village, where I learned a traditional form of weaving known as asoke.
 

I befriended a young handsome Lebanese man who frequently visited the village on business. On occasion, he’d buy me lunch and engage me in conversation about American culture. One day, after giving me a ride to my flat, he forced his way in and got increasingly aggressive. Had it not been for a neighbor hearing the commotion and coming upstairs, the outcome of that encounter could have been much different.

It’s always wise to be aware of your surroundings. Depending on the region of the world one plans to visit, being a single female traveler can bring with it varying degrees of exposure.

For example, in Middle Eastern countries, the way a woman dresses can dictate the way she is treated. Showing too much skin is offensive, and it’s not uncommon for women to report being leered at, followed, groped and worse.

In 2001, the Sharjah government of Dubai in the United Arab Emirates passed a “Decency Law” that emphasizes the wearing of decent clothes in public places, particularly at mosques. Bikinis or mini-skirts are frowned upon, and the same law also prohibits private meetings between men and women who are not related.

But even when there is no law governing one’s dress, observing local customs not only shows respect, it makes your life easier.

In India, for example, I went out one day in New Delhi wearing a traditional women’s pantsuit known as a salwaar kameez. Although I was clearly not Indian, I found that people seemed to welcome my appreciation for their dress.

On the other hand, I entered a mosque one day with a knee-length skirt that showed my calves. I was promptly excoriated by an old man who thrust a long wrap at me and waited until I covered myself before letting me go any further.

The bottom line is, be aware of the world around you, but don’t let it stop you from diving in.